THE STATIC AGE
So I'm back from tour, and what a glorious way to return with none other than the coveted front page article -- a slot usually reserved for the J-Man but bestowed upon me in this issue, for I have very important news for all of you fiendish FP followers. Forbidden Planet has formed a most unholy union with none other than Nightmare: "New York's most horrifying haunted house" (Okay, so maybe that description is a direct quote pulled from their advertising campaign but I fully back it.) in order to bring you kids some deep discounts, a most non-heinous event of epic proportions, and a few extra bad dreams this Fall. Now before I go ahead and spill the beans, let me give you a little background on our partners in crime.
For four years now, Nightmare's creator Timothy Haskell and his Psycho Clan have put their blood, sweat and fears into said haunted house hoping to send some stone-faced locals out their exits with tails between legs, crying for mommy. Considering Nightmare just gets bigger and bigger each year I can comfortably say they're a success, and a commendable one at that. Scaring New Yorkers is no easy feat. Remember, we lived through 9/11 first-hand.
What sets this particular haunted house apart from your average bad animatronic Dracula, snakes in the hair, day-glow paint-filled amusement attraction is constant reinvention and a little help from you and me. Last year's house, "Face Your Fear", was based on surveys taken by actual New Yorkers exposing their greatest fears. This year's theme is "Ghost Stories" with 23 rooms (almost twice as many as last year) to walk through, each based on real paranormal experiences (from information gathered through internet polling) and a few classic scary stories you may find familiar. Not to mention the icing on the cake -- as if 23 rooms of phantoms, poltergeists, and demons isn't enough fear fodder for your taste, try to escape The Maze: an optional new addition to Nightmare. Not even David Bowie can comfortably navigate this labyrinth.
So now you're totally stoked! You're sold, all you need now is the where and when. It all goes down at the CSV Cultural Center located at 107 Suffolk St. right in the middle of all that hip L.E.S. nightlife. They open their doors to the eagerly anticipating public on September 28th for a five-week run ending on November 3rd, leaving you with plenty of opportunities to enjoy some good old-fashioned scares.
But why wait? Beat the Halloween rush and head over early. Go on a day like, say... I don't know... Thursday October 4th, which just so happens to be Forbidden Planet Night! That's right, come down of FP night where we will be partying with none other than Arthur Suydam. I'm sure Mr. Suydam would be more than happy to sign your copy of Marvel Zombies, or my copy of Marvel Zombies Vs. Army Of Darkness No.1 2nd printing with that sweet cover featuring zombie Captain America beating the crap out zombie Hitler! (Don't fret, we have plenty copies in stock and other great Suydam stuff for you guys and gals to get your grubby mitts on)
And if that's not enough to get you down there, we will be giving away some sweet swag and having a raffle for the chance to win some neat-o prizes. Be sure to use the coupon on the back of this issue when purchasing tickets for a whopping 5 bucks off admission. I told you there would be discounts involved. But wait, there's more! A special edition of the Weekly Planet with an exclusive coupon for big FP savings will only be available at Nightmare. So be sure to mark your calendar and I'll see you next Thursday, kids.
Oh and when you're there, if you hear someone screaming like a little school girl... It was probably Jeff, not me. Definitely not me. Okay maybe it was me, just don't tell anyone.
- Matt D.
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